Thanks, Guy.

On Thursday night I made a few stops to bars before heading home and imbibed more than was likely necessary to unwind from work.

Once I finally made it to the C line, I was feeling ever so sleepy, so I decided to rest my weary eyes for a moment or two.

An hour or so later, I was awoken by a train conductor who politely notified me that the train was done for the evening and that it was stopped at the end of the line in the East New York/Woodhaven region.

I said ok and pretended like I wasn’t totally confused about my whereabouts and headed toward the Manhattan-bound track. After waiting about 15 minutes for the C to arrive, I took it back home and about 3 stops from my very own, the very same conductor just so happened to walk through the car I was on and spotted me. He politely notified me that I had left my cell phone back in East New York and that it was waiting at the counter.

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It’s Official

If I were in front of my class right now, I’d go for extra cheese-ball and drama and announce that the votes are in for least credible awards show. But this isn’t my classroom, so I’ll simply say the Emmys are officially 0% credible. Breaking Bad over True Detective for drama series?! Modern Family over Orange Is the New Black for comedy series?! Bryan Cranston instead of Matthew McConaughey for lead actor?! Julianna Margulies over Lizzy Caplan for lead actress?! The Colbert Report over the Tonight Show w/ Jimmy Fallon?!

Really. Really?